What kind of relationship can be called a toxic relationship?

Salvabrani.com , Jakarta – Every relationship has its ups and downs and fights. In a healthy relationship, fights must find a way out and be resolved in a good way. A healthy relationship is also characterized by partners discussing issues openly, enjoying each other’s company, and supporting each other’s decisions.

When the fight doesn’t find a bright spot and you don’t feel happiness with your partner, be careful that you might have fallen into a toxic relationship, aka toxic relationship. Toxic relationships that are continuously maintained can actually hurt you and your partner. Be careful, this condition can be bad for your mental health.

Signs of a Toxic Relationship

Launching from Healthline, signs of a toxic relationship can be subtle or very clear. If your partner shows the following signs, it means your relationship has entered the toxic relationship category:

1. Lack of support

The foundation of a healthy relationship is a shared desire to see the partner succeed in all areas of life. If your partner actually sees every achievement as a competition, it means that the situation has turned toxic. When everything becomes a competition, you must feel unsupported by your partner when you want to achieve certain things.

2. Communication is not good

Signs of a toxic relationship are also marked by conversations that only contain sarcasm, criticism, and debate. Over time, communication like this will only lead to fights. In the end, you may want to avoid talking to each other because you are tired of arguing.

3. Excessive jealousy

Jealous with your partner occasionally may be natural. However, if this feeling of jealousy continues for no apparent reason, even to the point of disrupting your life and relationships with close friends or relatives, it means you have entered into a toxic relationship.

4. Controlling behavior

Does your partner often ask your location or how you are all the time? This may be normal for your partner to do to make sure your condition is okay. However, if your partner gets really annoyed when you don’t answer messages or calls right away, be careful, this is one of the early signs of a toxic relationship.

What kind of relationship can be called a toxic relationship?

5. Dishonesty

If you frequently make up lies about your whereabouts to avoid your partner, you may be in a very uncomfortable phase in your relationship. This attitude is usually triggered by the behavior of a partner who likes to control so you don’t have your own space.

6. Always restless

Tension in a relationship that continues to occur can make you nervous at any time. This condition can be an indicator that something is wrong. If persisted, this ongoing anxiety can take a toll on your mental and physical health.

7. Ignore the need

If you always follow whatever your partner wants to do, even though you know it is against your wishes and even ignore your needs, this is a sign of a relationship that has entered a toxic relationship.

8. Keep away from relatives

Another very clear sign of a toxic relationship is the possessiveness of your partner. This possessive attitude can keep you away from friends and family just to avoid conflict with your partner.

9. Lack of self-care

Toxic relationships can also make you neglect self-care that you usually do. You may not have time to do hobbies, neglect your health, and sacrifice your free time just for your partner. If left unchecked, this can stress you out and make you vulnerable to physical and mental problems.

10. Expect partners to change

Not a few people still survive in toxic relationships, because they believe that changing yourself and your actions can also change your partner for the better. In the end, this method will only torture or hurt yourself.

What Is a Toxic Relationship?

Salvabrani.com – A toxic relationship is one that makes you feel unsupported, misunderstood, demeaned, or attacked. A relationship is toxic when your well-being is threatened in some way—emotionally, psychologically, and even physically.

On a basic level, any relationship that makes you feel worse rather than better can become toxic over time. Toxic relationships can exist in just about any context, from the playground to the boardroom to the bedroom. You may even deal with toxic relationships among your family members.

People with mental illnesses, such as bipolar disorder, major depression, or even depressive tendencies, may be particularly susceptible to toxic relationships since they are already sensitive to negative emotions.

For example, someone with bipolar disorder who is in the midst of a mixed or depressive episode may have a somewhat weaker grip on emotional stability than others, and that may make that person an easier target for toxic people. However, toxic people can affect anyone.

Here’s what you need to know about toxic relationships, including what makes a relationship toxic and how to determine if you’re in one. You’ll also find tips for effective ways to manage these types of relationships, such as going to online therapy or online couples counseling.

Signs of a Toxic Relationship

Only you can tell if the bad outweighs the good in a relationship. But if someone consistently threatens your well-being by what they’re saying, doing, or not doing, it’s likely a toxic relationship.

Relationships that involve physical or verbal abuse are definitely classified as toxic. But there are other, more subtle, signs of a toxic relationship, including:

You give more than you’re getting, which makes you feel devalued and depleted.
You feel consistently disrespected or that your needs aren’t being met.
You feel a toll on your self-esteem over time.
You feel unsupported, misunderstood, demeaned, or attacked.
You feel depressed, angry, or tired after speaking or being with the other person.
You bring out the worst in each other. For example, your competitive friend brings out a spite-based competitive streak that is not enjoyable for you.
You are not your best self around the person. For example, they bring out the gossipy side of you, or they seem to draw out a mean streak you don’t normally have.
You feel like you have to walk on eggshells around this person to keep from becoming a target of their venom.
You spend a lot of time and emotional strength trying to cheer them up.
You are always to blame. They turn things around so things you thought they had done wrong are suddenly your fault.

Toxic vs. Abusive Relationships

Not all toxic relationships are abusive; however, all abusive relationships can be considered toxic.

In a toxic relationship, there is usually a lack of respect and a violation of boundaries. Sometimes, this behavior occurs without the person even realizing they’re doing it.

But, if this kind of behavior is consistently repeated with the active intent to harm the other person, the relationship could be considered abusive.

Abuse can take many forms—such as psychological, emotional, and physical abuse. Abusive relationships tend to also follow the cycle of abuse. For example, the stages of the cycle of abuse usually involve:1

Tension starts to build.
An act of abuse occurs.
The person who committed the act apologizes, blames the victim, or minimizes the abuse.
There is a period of time during which no abuse occurs; however, the cycle eventually repeats.
In addition, toxic relationships may be more subjective than abusive ones. For instance, if you have a history of being lied to, you might consider anyone who lies a toxic person; someone else might be more willing to let it slide and give the person who lied a second chance.

If you or a loved one is experiencing abuse of any kind, there are resources that can help.

Toxic vs. Healthy Behavior

When determining if a relationship is creating toxicity, it’s important to look at which behaviors are being displayed most frequently in the relationship.

What Is a Toxic Relationship?

In other words, if one or both of you are consistently selfish, negative, and disrespectful, you could be creating toxicity in the relationship. But if you’re mostly encouraging, compassionate, and respectful, then there might just be certain issues that create toxicity that need to be addressed.

It’s important to recognize the signs of toxicity—whether it’s in you or in the other person. Here are some signs of both toxic behaviors and healthy behaviors.

Types of Toxic Relationships

It’s important to note that toxic relationships are not limited to romantic relationships. They exist in families, in the workplace, and among friend groups—and they can be extremely stressful, especially if the toxicity isn’t effectively managed.

When there are negative behaviors: Some people’s constant complaining, critical remarks, and overall negativity create a toxic environment. Other toxic traits may include perfectionism, unhealthy competitiveness, and frequent lying. A person may also let their insecurities bring out the worst in them.

When one (or both) people lack self-awareness: Sometimes people are unaware of their negative effect on others. They also may not know healthier ways to communicate. It’s likely that they don’t know how to read social cues well enough to know when they’re frustrating people or making them feel like they are being criticized or ignored.
When a person intentionally hurts others: Some people are deliberately rude and hurtful. In these situations, you may feel singled out and targeted through their mean words and actions. A person may also try to control or manipulate you, which is toxic behavior.
When a partner is constantly cheating: If an intimate partner lies and cheats without even trying to change their behavior, it adds a toxic element to the relationship.
When a person is abusive: When people repeatedly and intentionally hurt you, their behavior can be considered abusive. Whether they are constantly gossiping about you, or they are physically harming you in any way, abuse is never OK.

Toxic Behavior

  • Insecure
  • Jealous
  • Negative
  • Self-centered
  • Selfish
  • Critical
  • Demeaning
  • Distrusting
  • Abusive
  • Disrespectful
Healthy Behavior

  • Secure
  • Loving
  • Positive
  • Giving
  • Selfless
  • Encouraging
  • Uplifting
  • Trustworthy
  • Compassionate
  • Respectful